Blogging · Weightloss

Body image

the last few weeks I’ve been thinking a bit about body image, namely my own warped perception of how I think I look versus how I actually look, how I feel about it

I’ve come to notice how I feel I look depends greatly on who I stand next to, I’ve always felt, big and awkward, I’ve occasionally taken this to be Fat but, big and Awkward fits on so many levels, at 5’9 I stand the same height on average most males (lucky for me the boy is 6’3) and at least half a head taller than most females I encounter…… there’s the big feeling for you being as tall as those I should be shorter than by some warped perception of society, and taller than those I should stand the same height as

when I stand in a room of people averaging 6’ tall I feel kind of small , when I walk with and talk to someone around 5’, I feel extraordinarily tall

I am not graceful, at all, as I know it, i have to work hard on balance and co-ordination, but I am strong, I know that, a recent strength test a the Gym proved that, the aim was for max 10 reps, leg press, i started at 60kg and it took 6 sets raising the weight each time to finally get to the point that I struggled to get started then only just made it through the 10, at 127kg, it’s something I’m pleased with, also proof that I am capable of more than is expected

working on body image is hard when all that really matters is in your head, reality if I were long and lean I would struggle more than I do to do some of my work, the fact that I can stand on my steel cap to be [____________________] that much taller to reach, i can get down with my legs behind me to shift that heavy thing/stiff bolt are bonuses.

I know if I want to I can get dolled up and feel like a princess it doesn’t really matter to me how others perceive my shape and size, it’s all about feel, learning to focus on the good feels and ignoring the rest is perhaps something to work on self perception and values around image are very hard to change


3 thoughts on “Body image

  1. Eh, you’re a whippersnapper! I totally understand where you’re coming from with the body image. I am tall and big boned (my skeleton is a size ten. I know this because I weighed under 50kg in my 20s and I still was a size ten. I weigh a LOT more than that now). I’m 5’11 in bare feet – I should have topped 6′ but had un-diagnosed until recently mild scoliosis when I was a teenager. I have long arms and long legs (34′ inseam) – everything’s always that little bit too short and buying clothes is hard work because things don’t sit where they’re supposed to…

    To add to my issues, I come from a family of bloody pygmies – Cornish pit miners. I’ve always felt like a big galumphing galoot around them. And my alleged BFF from highschool was short and fat and made me feel like being the height of a boy and built like a boy was a bad thing.

    But it’s cool to be tall. I love the look on people’s faces when I unfold from sitting down and keep on going up and up. I love that I am fit and strong – it’s all about the leverage. The bloke is taller than me (he’s 6’1) and the kids are going to be tall – so I’m going to find out what it’s like to be the smallest one in the household which will be weird. I haven’t been the shortest since I was 2!

  2. Sadly I think all of us have issues with our body shapes – yes even me tall and willowy, but may possibly blow away in a huge gust of wind. I would LOVE to put on more weight but sadly I only gain weight in pregnancy & we all know that doesnt help me 😉

    Also incase you were wondering I have two different shaped nostrils. Yeah. Im weird like that.

    You are beautiful inside and out Beesome 😍 and wow on the weight work out, Im flat out lifting my sewing machine in and out of the car!!!

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