Brain Dumps · family · Miss · work

Boobies men and the boy

I woke up this morning after my nap to the boy yelling at miss for making a mess with her egg and toast, he just dosen’t seem to get that if he sits at the table with her and eats she eats rather than plays then there was alot of crying it was her nap time, which also means feed time I wwas glad I was awake cause then I could feed her ….. oh how wrong I was, the water board had turned off the water to put a valve in the street, the boy made up a bottle of formula with the hot water because thats all that was running, It was way to hot so he was stressing at miss to shut up and wait, I got up and went to get her, I got yelled at to go back to bed, Like I can sleep with full boobies and a sreaming baby in the house…. i’ll let you imagine the arguement including him being informed that the bottles so I could sleep are the reason we had to buy formula in the first place, followed by me officially leaving, he reckons he and she can live with out me than so be it my departure was accompanied by protests over my tired state and lack of sleep and driving not going together very well. I went anyway, I couldn’t care less, I even sorta hoped I’d get into a big crash. where was I going to go what was I going to do I didn’t know nor did I care I followed the roads to the freeway then headed up the mountains…….. almost blinded by tears till halfway upp, driving hard is a great stress reliever, i was thinking I’l use half a tank then head back home, but I’m so tired, I don’t want to go crawling back, let him worry for a while maybe go till 1 and turn around then I’ll get home just before he leaves for work…. I saw thw sign to richmond, that sounded like a nice drive, from almost katoomba to richmond off I went…… I got a txet, with a pic of miss in her swing, “come hoem and sleep mummy, we’ll be quiet” he just so doesnt get it, I replied that the noise wasn’t the issue his refusing to let me feed my baby was “well do what you want then, I’l throw the formula out”, that so wasn’t what I wanted I still haven’t got what I want, a simple I’m sorry I yelled at you I understand things aren’t the way you hoped they would be is all I want, its too late to theorw out the formula, I simply don’t have the time or the support to be able to build my supply back to what it was before last time i did night shift. i got home around lunch time, miss was asleep, I got the pump out ( i hate doing that at home) got 75mls total and showed the boy, ” I used to get 100mls every go ” ,”yeah well whatever”……. bastard

the other day at work the stupid first aid officer walks up to me out in the open and asks “are you stil lactating” i was taken back the first thang that went through my mind was WTF?(yes the letters not the words) I very gruffly informed him that I was and I intend to be for around 2 years “oh is tha how long they recomend is it” ….. another bastard … he can’t handle that he can no longer sleep in the first aid room or use it as his private lunch room…… tough no one else who relieves him does either of those things, they go and get the cordless phone and only go back in the afternoon to return the phone unless someone gets injured, i’m not happy with this one he keeps telling ppl what I am doing thats none of their business and the ones I see look rather embarressed by the knowledge being shared, he has also started moving my stuff, I plug my pump into the wall ready to go so all I have to do is attach the bottles, run the pump and store the milk this setup gets my time down to 10-15 mins he moves my pump into the corner on top of the fridge because it was in the way the last time he mentioned moving it was because the box inspector was coming ….. the time before that was a cleaner needed a bandaid and apparently he was going to toss it accross the room I will have to have a word with this man I need to be comfortable, I need privacy, if he can’t accept that I may have to have a word with the HR lady about the way I am being treated


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